The biggest turn-on on earth for me is making someone laugh. Oddly enough, I don’t care if they make me laugh. It’s all about can I get a guffaw. Other turn-ons? Height and volcanoes.
I jest not (I’ll explain height later); let’s unpack volcanoes before they blow the gasket.
The risk, the lore, the oozing magma, caressing the hillsides and annihilating innocents…why are volcanoes so goddamn sexy? There are a million metaphors we could make! But we can’t look past the sexy side effect of volcanoes; they impact the grapevines sprouting from their slopes.
Some cite the soils–typically higher in iron and potassium–dare I say I sometimes detect something blood-adjacent in the wines? As certain savory vibe? Categorized as igneous, soil type examples include granite, basalt, and tuff.
I love me some volcano wines.
So here’s a few, each from their own volcano-y soil spot. Tune in. Sip it up.
Tasca d’Almerita Tenuta Tascante 2022 Buonora Etna DOC Etna is an active volcano–there are different categories of eruptions, but there was notable action as late as 2023 from Mt Etna, which lies in east Sicily. Carricante is probably the best-known of Sicilian white grapes, and this wine brings ripe, sweet citrus, peaches and red plums and a sparkle of minerality. Fresh and, at the same time, quasi-palate-coating with a floral lilt. Super textured but light on its toes–it’s a tap dancer.
2022 Tasca d’Almerita Tenuta Capofaro Didyme Salina IGT hails from the island of Salina, part of the Lipari (Aeolian) Islands north of Sicily. “Didyme” refers to the two (now dormant) volcanoes that birthed it. Malvasia di Lipari is the variety. It is light, refreshing and juicy AF, bringing all sorts of citrus (lime, lemon, tangerine, white grapefruit) and stone fruit (apricot, white nectarine, yellow peach) to the party to play. Dappled with minerals and cane sugar simple syrup (without being sweet). Lively and alive, backed by a gentle, suave, soothing, without veering into total syrupy texture. Every sip gives more.
2021 Inama Carmenère Più Veneto Rosso IGT woooeeee, okay, let’s discuss how volcanoes feature here! In this case, it is the dormant volcano Mount Foscarino in northern Italy. This yields a chocolatey yet smoky vibe, vacillating between bright red but rich fruit, green peppercorn, and cocoa and coffee beans. It is rather gorgeous yet humble, not showy, but it has a lot to show.